Salutations and welcome to another session of WWBS or What Would Bangs Say? Today's question is from follower - Amanda Jayne Ayee. "Why are we so harsh on ourselves?"
Great question, Amanda! This is something many people struggle with. Especially my human. I believe this is not a "One size fits all" question as there are many possible reasons people do this. Let's go over a few.
1) Protection/Low self-esteem
My human has a bad habit of this one. They fear rejection and getting hurt. When it comes to criticism, they like to "beat them to the punch" as you might call it.
As an example, if human asks for feedback on something and she sees a flaw first, she'll point it out. That way, it won't hurt or surprise her if the other person sees it.
She has this same mentality with bullies as well... It's very unhealthy. But moving on -
2) Comparing ourselves to others
This is another thing my human does often. It's natural for people to compare themselves to others from time to time.
Doing it constantly while using it to determine your worth, however, is unhealthy. An example of an unhealthy comparison - "She's better looking than I am so I must be ugly".
Y'know, people like to compare me to a lot of people too. Even Hitler! (Come on, I'm SO much cuter than him.
3) High Standards/Unrealistic Expectations
This is the final reason some people are so hard on themselves.
An example of this - Sharing something online and expecting it to get one million views overnight. It rarely works like that. I think if my human ever got one million views on anything, they wouldn't believe it's real life.
I hope this helped you better understand why humans can be so harsh on themselves. As a cat, I know better, of course. Thank you so much for the question, Amanda! We appreciated hearing from you. Stay well and shine bright, starlights!
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Wise words from Miss Bangs. Made so much easier by seeing her lovely face. Shine on Miss Bangs we are all devoted starlight here. 🌟
On point!! High expectations are fine if within that expectation you can reach it, I, for example think I sing like a rock star. It hurts when people cringe but they are right and it is ok for me to feel deflatef. I can not do everything .Had long as Hooman does the best of Hooman’s ability. No contest!
Thank you, Miss Bangs and Hooman for the great advice but that leads me to a question. Knowing we should love ourselves is step one but HOW do we start to love ourselves?
Great advice. Love YOURSELF!!
Wonderful! I’m so happy to see your page! Beautiful as always Miss Bangs!